I recently instituted a "Good Choice Jar" for the kids after a suggestion from my girlie Carolyn. Seth and Leah both have one. Cool, right?
The idea is that each time he or she makes a good choice, they get a fuzzy ball to put inside. When it's full, they have earned a surprise! In Seth's case, it's the pirate ship he has been wanting for a while. For Leah? Well, a doll, of course. She couldn't possibly have enough of those...
I like the jar because it rewards good behavior. And we talk about it, a lot. Seth declares, "I want to make good decisions!" at the top of his lungs only 38 times a day. (sigh) But on my run today (insert giggling here), I started to think about sin and then my kiddos and raising them to do right, respect their mama, make good choices, and be believers. Hmmmm.....
The decision jar -- at least as it is used in this house -- doesn't quite get at that. Sin is the wrong choice, but it is also the good choice that was left undone. Sharing when we didn't want to. Hugging when someone is sad. Caring when you were too busy to care.
So as I jogged along, I got to thinking about how I'm doing at those things.
I didn't like that "discussion."
Impatient much?
Check.
Yelling?
Yep, that too.
Distracted by things that just don't matter?
Ding.
Prioritizing wrong things?
Hallo!
Angering your kiddos?
Even that, on the bad days.
When I'm messing up DAILY on these things, how can I possibly think my children are going to get it right? And yet, somehow the good is sinking in.
Just this morning, Seth was lecturing me on Leah's hair.
(Note that there is no "doing it right" for Leah. Hair = disaster)
"Mom, be more gentle."
"Go slowly!"
"Let me do it."
"She's crying!!!"
I love Seth's heart for his sister (who he rarely calls Leah, but rather "My Baby Sister.")
Then there is Leah. I picked her up from school today. We had about 20 minutes until Seth was ready so we played at the park. When it was time, we got in the car to go. As we neared Seth's school, Leah was busy chattering away about how I picked her up instead of Debbie (their nanny) and then she proclaimed:
"Mommy, we go pick up MY Seth Cameron?"
Ahhh, yes lovie. We are picking up your Seth Cameron.
What does all this mean?
I'm not sure, but I think it means I need to be a better parent. Or a different one. I want to teach my children not only what is wrong but kindness, gentleness, self-control, patience, love.....
Maybe I need a good decision jar.
And no. I'm not kidding.
